tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23356740491287650582024-02-08T14:35:52.011+08:00no one is allowed to label me but mele soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-25799638357269779852011-01-03T18:29:00.000+08:002011-01-03T18:29:26.419+08:00not a resolution, more of an avowal<div style="text-align: justify;">sometimes, there are times in your life where <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you are standing at a fork in the road...</b></span> sometimes, there are times in your life when you are standing in a road that forks 1000 ways... and each of those roads splits in another 1000 directions... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">there are times when an infinity of choices present themselves to you... and <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>when i say sometimes, i mean always...</b></span> we always have an infinity of choices... but usually, we’re able to go through life without being forced to make a choice that is different... by default, we tend to make the choice to engage in a routine... get up at 10am, go to the cafe, go to work, etc., etc... it’s easy to slip into a routine – and make the choice to be conditioned...<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b> it is less often that we are forced to make a choice that means change...</b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> </div><div> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"> anyway, i’m at the point in my life where i must make a choice that will put me down a different path... i’m being thrown from routine into unknown... i’m thankful for that, because <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>it is in the unknown that i’ll grow... </b></span>sometimes, you need a little push... i know things are going to change, and it will be big... the ideas of letting others be known to this change of my life is as mystifying as it is to let it be known to myself... i might say i'm not prepared, but when will i ever be, when will you ever be, you and i both know, you and i need a little push, that would be all...</div><br />
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* i dont know why, i cant upload a pic for tis post, personal reminder, get it uploaded!!le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-33051619046237599452010-12-08T14:22:00.002+08:002010-12-08T14:36:05.390+08:00architect <-> picasso<div style="text-align: justify;">you are the architect of your life; you are the Picasso of your dreams... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>the future is yours to create</b></span>... it’s very easy to forget that in each moment you have an infinity of choices – and just because you are in a certain patter of choices, doesn’t mean you can’t change it... if you are unhappy with something, then listen to that message.. examine what it is that you don’t like, and change it... change your patterns and you’ll change your experience...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div></div><div style="text-align: justify;">it’s hard for people to take responsibility of their life – to know that this moment is how it is because of a series of choices... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>if you are unhappy with your life, it’s because you created it that way</b></span>... that’s very hard for people to own... sure, there are certain situations that are beyond our control... someone might say, my father died when I was 8 and my mom is an asshole – that has created my life and I did not choose it... I’d say, of course you didn’t choose those situations, but you did choose how you would react to those situations, and you chose how you would move on from those situations... situations are external to you – but you internalize situations through your reactions and through the lessons you extract...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">so, take responsibility for where you are... if you’re unhappy, it’s for a reason... it’s because of a decision or series of decisions that you made consciously or unconsciously... learn the lesson contained within that journey, and in this moment, make a decision that is new and different - <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>a decision that will bring unbounded happiness to you, and thus, those around you... </b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">you are the architect of your life; you are the Picasso of your dreams... t<span id="goog_871279084"></span><span id="goog_871279085"></span>he future is yours to create. </div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgmgBfKx6mTbLQRzCr3IA-Wiqg7HO9scFiPPU6w1vNqUwQczXhs0qNFTcO64G6-PmJT0adj-tz0vwySbYa_l4nQspJnS9XK4XdZVrQYaMh9KojilzJF6KCtUEhEG1U06f6g7DdqpyPXSxB/s1600/_MG_6103.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgmgBfKx6mTbLQRzCr3IA-Wiqg7HO9scFiPPU6w1vNqUwQczXhs0qNFTcO64G6-PmJT0adj-tz0vwySbYa_l4nQspJnS9XK4XdZVrQYaMh9KojilzJF6KCtUEhEG1U06f6g7DdqpyPXSxB/s640/_MG_6103.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> you choose your own path of life and be prepared for the consequences..</div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-14877934316653680832010-10-15T19:16:00.000+08:002010-10-15T19:16:28.339+08:00the purpose of living..<div style="text-align: justify;">its been a while since i last posted..and i gave some thought to the <b><span style="font-size: x-large;">purpose of life</span></b> these past few days... i used to think that the purpose of living was to leave this world a little bit better... but, “better” means something different to me than it does to my mother, to my neighbors, and to people living thousands of miles away. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">hitler thought the world would be “better” without the Jews, and perhaps he believed on his dying bed that<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b> he had changed the world for the better...</b></span> the lack of universality in the notion of “better” and its inherent subjectivity reject the idea that the purpose of life is to change the world for the better...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> </div><div> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"> it occurred to me that the purpose of life is much simpler... the purpose of life is to be...you are fulfilling your purpose just by existing... your purpose is to experience the world and the universe in your own unique way... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>your experience of the universe is your purpose.</b><b>..</b></span> by going to school, by going to work, by engaging in your relationships and by seeing the universe through your eyes, you are serving your purpose... by sleeping late, by idling – even by doing nothing, you are living out your purpose...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">i know that people like to think otherwise; people like to think that their purpose in life is something grand and exciting... that they were born to save a family of four from a burning apartment at some point in the future... and maybe they will... or, maybe they won’t... there are millions of roles we will play during our lives... yes, at times we may be rescuers or saviors, and at other times we may be villains and thieves...we’ll have jobs, and we will make contributions to the world – some “good” and some “bad” depending on your frame of reference... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>but these roles aren’t our purpose; they come and go...</b></span> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"> </div><div style="text-align: justify;"> but what I’m suggesting is even grander... there are lots of heroes and leaders and such... but there is only one you... you are the only person that can experience the universe like you do... even if you live out your life in a cold, dark cave, you will have served your purpose – for no one can see the world like you...<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you’re the rarest of the rare...</b></span> you’re the only one that will ever be as you are..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgg5oUe9Gj0_h6x7xXdQQwcF4SEZqaFPyqQPl-iSfaRarFDCmAlYV0hVZxKX94XLloYV0vR-D21mL441HqJgzJj5ZdEYzogW56Uos5tToMxgP3UScZv4M8idRCGYe2Pc7YsH57sMvocs3V/s1600/id+%2825%29.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgg5oUe9Gj0_h6x7xXdQQwcF4SEZqaFPyqQPl-iSfaRarFDCmAlYV0hVZxKX94XLloYV0vR-D21mL441HqJgzJj5ZdEYzogW56Uos5tToMxgP3UScZv4M8idRCGYe2Pc7YsH57sMvocs3V/s640/id+%2825%29.jpg" width="428" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> there is only one me, there's no such thing as seven of me..</div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-82739011916228278062010-08-13T19:03:00.001+08:002010-08-16T15:11:09.016+08:00is pain bad???<div style="text-align: justify;">if someone gave you the option of living a life without any pain —<span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>would you say yes???</b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div></div><div style="text-align: justify;">it turns out that there is a very rare disease in which exactly that happens... i was learning about the disease today — in the rarest forms its victims feel no pain at all... not even if their arm was hacked off with an axe... children who have this disease usually don’t live past age three. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">there was one boy who had this disease... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>he could feel no pain</b></span>... his parents noticed the disease when — at age two — instead of chewing on toys to help with the teething process, he chewed on his own fingers, resulting in bloody stumps. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">you see, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>everything happens for a reason</b></span>... this is especially true with our bodies... everything has a purpose — even pain... when we feel pain, our bodies are giving us a message... if our stomachs growl, it means we are hungry... if we feel a sharp pain in our hand, our reflexes pull our hand back... essentially, we learn to interact with the world through pain — we learn to avoid the things which cause it... and those things that we avoid, are things that are not good for our growth. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">the young boy who has this disease doesn’t even know when to eat, because hunger is pain... his body does not sweat when he runs around, since exercise does not “hurt” him... yet, he feels everything else... he laughs when people tickle him... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>he experiences all the pleasure in the world,</b></span> but none of the pain. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">so, a life without pain is not a good thing... pain, then, is not bad... it is what it is... the young boy’s disease is a great example of chinese philosophy — which teaches that <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you must know pain to know pleasure, and pleasure to know pain...</b></span> it’s very yin and yang... it’s an important lesson taught by a devastating disease. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">i’ve read that if live was a river, with one side of the river pain and the other pleasure, it would be best to stay in the middle... if you get too close to either side, you slow down and get caught in the mud... it’s important to know that life will have pain and pleasure — but that it should be lived for neither... too much pleasure leads to addiction... too much pain eclipses the joy of life... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL1LT2cCO8yF3-HIKEcZlBDhGCuSB1I9x8kfd5WjdS4qpBas4AP2MQhtEiCIYWvugkiTVB8hyn-Rxg7wuNHmhz5rlTYOF6qkEOTUhBzkwEAeacq1EhzzuvB9XLYhhtjoTWpLUX3TOpNW2t/s1600/DSC_6136.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL1LT2cCO8yF3-HIKEcZlBDhGCuSB1I9x8kfd5WjdS4qpBas4AP2MQhtEiCIYWvugkiTVB8hyn-Rxg7wuNHmhz5rlTYOF6qkEOTUhBzkwEAeacq1EhzzuvB9XLYhhtjoTWpLUX3TOpNW2t/s640/DSC_6136.JPG" width="427" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> we have to learn to live with pain...</div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-59001804628971122192010-08-11T13:17:00.002+08:002010-08-11T17:42:19.400+08:00will it be any different this year??<div style="text-align: justify;">i've had gone through 21 years of living, in i'm just starting my 22nd year... while others may not see it, i can feel it, i have gradually changed since i was still a kid... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>i remember being a small boy with a not-so-small physical, and a smaller self-esteem</b></span>... and then i remember growing up, people around me confessed to me that they are jealous of my confidence, my ignorance of what others might say... come to think about it, i am not confident and i am afraid of what others say about me... i think its due to the fact that i put my own desire and satisfaction above anyone else's... i think what's best for me, not what others think is best for me...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">but the question still lingering, how was change possible??? was i the one who did it??? had anyone else intercept or was he/she an enzyme to this change??? i am not able to answer this myself, this change that i see in me, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>i guess it must be a result of an evolutionary process</b></span>...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">the question that i should ask myself is will it be any different this year??? over the last two years, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>i have had my heart broken, repaired, broken again</b></span>, with no one,i repeat <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>NO ONE BUT ME</b></span>, knows about it... yeah maybe some of my closest friends had same ideas, but none knew how i felt...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">in terms of my studies, will it be any different this year??? i had always been a great student when i was a child, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>god knows what happened to me, i wish it will be different this yea</b><b>r,</b></span> but then again, there's no point of just wishing, i need some motive and some action so that i can get the motivation..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">as my birthday is the starting day of our fasting month, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>i do hope this could be an indicatio</b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>n</b></span> for me to grow spiritually, to be a more pious me..i do hope i will be ble to grow <span class="equals">in this aspect... again, i do not know what or who changed me, i have no one to blame but me...</span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="equals"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="equals">so, i hope this year will be different, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>age 22, will be a turning point for me...</b></span></span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijRKdmSnpGsRMdKd1sO4aM3QpZimInDzPqgbdb-TQRq_ZOIF0z3pzhVKjOT4yrGDuxCmV4vEz5QHSGcSqoawWVTImeI2rJUmr8a5PiNJ2ZuGZWfGE0VoFojIs_8PEMpnjiUDHx-AEKA95T/s1600/DSCN7115a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijRKdmSnpGsRMdKd1sO4aM3QpZimInDzPqgbdb-TQRq_ZOIF0z3pzhVKjOT4yrGDuxCmV4vEz5QHSGcSqoawWVTImeI2rJUmr8a5PiNJ2ZuGZWfGE0VoFojIs_8PEMpnjiUDHx-AEKA95T/s640/DSCN7115a.jpg" width="430" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="equals"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="font-size: small;"> the 22-year-old me, wishing this year to be different</span></span></span><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="equals"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="font-size: small;">oh yeah, i got lots of ideas on what to write, but i don't feel like writing, so sorry if you guys think this entry is full of shit... </span></span></span></div></div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-39370541512379157542010-08-06T11:39:00.000+08:002010-08-06T11:42:59.283+08:00is there any problem sir???<div style="text-align: justify;">if you think about it, <b><span style="font-size: x-large;">problems aren’t real...</span></b> i was recently reading about this idea, and it struck me as very true... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">in this moment, tell me a problem that you have... not a problem you’ll have in a month, or a week… or even in 10 minutes... <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>tell me a problem you have now...</b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">there is no answer, because when your attention is fully in the now, there are no problems... sure, there may be a situation that needs to be either dealt with or accepted, but <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>why make it into a problem??? why struggle???</b></span> what do you need problems for??? your mind loves to warp situations into problems because it builds a sense of identity, but why waste your energy???</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">you have no problems tomorrow, because tomorrow doesn’t exist... only now exists...<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b> when you create problems, you create pain...</b></span> so, make a decision right now that you will no longer make problems for yourself... it really is that easy... it is a simple choice...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">and i think <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>pain and pleasure are flip sides of the same coin</b></span><span style="font-size: large;"><b>...</b></span> whenever there is pleasure, pain is lurking.. the line is so thin... love and hate are the same way... just look at relationships... look how quickly a loving relationship can become hateful... really, there is no duality... pain can not exist without pleasure, or light without dark... there is only one.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">and really, we create pain and pleasure in our minds. they aren’t real.. do you feel the stillness? the peace of mind? what a <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>simple but profound and radical choice...</b></span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxX3mGnwIny-NTrZ4-BcaksQm2IyU86pjvx5KChvnYxmjUhwdcX0Yu87-5qFhnlPizhPuPe2Mezdb5K0yzaK2UJ3rxfV9XNEBA800O95G0sRnDMBylN4d7r2JU3ts9zZbDDK2DjZCLjT_h/s1600/SDC11284.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxX3mGnwIny-NTrZ4-BcaksQm2IyU86pjvx5KChvnYxmjUhwdcX0Yu87-5qFhnlPizhPuPe2Mezdb5K0yzaK2UJ3rxfV9XNEBA800O95G0sRnDMBylN4d7r2JU3ts9zZbDDK2DjZCLjT_h/s400/SDC11284.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><span style="font-size: small;"> there no use of creating a problem...</span><b><br />
</b></span></div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-44375049191631312812010-08-05T08:27:00.000+08:002010-08-05T09:33:30.427+08:00living the life you love or loving the life you live??<div style="text-align: justify;">it amazes me how many people want to <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>live your life for you</b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>... </b></span> it seems as though people–even people you don’t even know–are invested in the way you live your life... everyone seems to have a suggestion for the way you should be living... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div></div><div style="text-align: justify;">i see it all the time...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">a lot of people seem to be invested in the fact that I used to have a long distance relationship... a common response is, “oh, i could never do that. isn’t a long distance relationship awful and hard? i don’t understand that.” the thing is, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>no one had to understand it–except for him and I</b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>... </b></span> why? because it’s not their lives... i don’t understand why people are so invested in the way i live my life... And of course it’s not awful or hard... it’s beautiful and amazing. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">i have a friend who is a vegetarian... i have heard so many people tell him that what he is doing is unhealthy, or that he isn’t really helping anything, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>blah, blah, blah</b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>... </b></span> if someone believes that being a vegetarian is wrong, then they shouldn’t be a vegetarian. .. but i don’t think they need to try to make other people take the same course of action... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>reality is an interpretation.<span style="font-size: x-large;">.</span></b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>. </b></span> the decisions that people make reflect the way that they see the world... you can’t force someone to see reality as you see it... therefore, you have to respect the decisions that people make regarding their lives... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">notably, there is a <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>d</b><b>ifference between trying to change someone and trying to educate someone...</b></span> but the intent behind education should not be change... change is a personal decision that needs to come from the inside... external change is superficial–but to believe something with your heart is much more powerful... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">and all the while, amidst the whirlwind, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>the secret to life revealed itself to me!!!</b></span> it’s two parts really... first, you really just have to row your own boat when it comes to river of life... and, you know, just rowing your own boat can be hard enough at times, never mind rowing the boats of everyone around you... in other words, you just need to live your life the way you want... you can’t tell other people what to do, or how to live their life. .. in the end, reality is an interpretation, and people are responding to the world the way they see it, the best they can... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">the second part is the important part. really,<span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>the secret to life is everything. or, well, nothing...</b></span> they both mean the same... life really is what you make it... it seems that no matter what you intend the world to be, it will shape around that perception... Someone who doesn’t believe in God may see the randomness of the universe... someone that believes in an underlying consciousness will see a silent hand acting behind ever seeming coincidence. whatever you want to see — the universe will meet you there... </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">so they really go hand in hand... you can’t force a person to act the way you want, because <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>y</b><b>ou can’t force a person to see through your eyes...</b></span> all you can do is accept everyone — unconditionally... i think the world spends a lot of time and energy trying to change the people around them, even the people they love... i’m not telling you that this is how you should live your life... simply, it is just what I have observed...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">so, again, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>row your own boat.. </b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjYTPStuzUmPXA9r4PyYJtasTlYK7xAIYU2SSvU1sLe016tlfATniyK03R-UeBm2IDE1Z9RIFvhrghUJbLNmi_pNygXMHhoA5v7QH7zK_Y0d_jWchk6X-TRKZn807mdiZZAUL_i4DwxyYx/s1600/P4260487.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="272" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjYTPStuzUmPXA9r4PyYJtasTlYK7xAIYU2SSvU1sLe016tlfATniyK03R-UeBm2IDE1Z9RIFvhrghUJbLNmi_pNygXMHhoA5v7QH7zK_Y0d_jWchk6X-TRKZn807mdiZZAUL_i4DwxyYx/s400/P4260487.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;">as if i can row my own boat in my community...</div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-68319631263152597442010-08-03T13:05:00.000+08:002010-08-05T08:53:41.203+08:00who am i to me???<div style="text-align: justify;">i have always thought of myself to be my own best friend and my own worst enemy. though at times it is hard for me to distinguish them, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>they are always there helping or sabotaging me</b></span>, yeah that is my idea of a friend and an enemy, friends are always there helping us while enemies are always there sabotaging us...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: justify;">when i am not thinking clearly, this enemy of mine always <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>does things that could always hurt me</b></span> at the end, and when needed, this friend of mine aren't always there,exposing me to the danger of my worst enemy, the estranged me...but there are also times when this lovely friend of mine share something that i<span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>shouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't</b></span> ever repeat it again to the whole world..but being an homophilic myself, i can't help but gossip with people who i am close with around me, this is where <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>the enemy of mine strikes back</b></span>, this is the perfect timing for him to sabotage me..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: justify;">all that i wish to point out here is that<span style="font-size: large;"><b> <span style="font-size: x-large;">as a friend of myself</span></b></span>, i often tell myself about how i feel..<span style="font-size: large;">.<b><span style="font-size: x-large;">so does my enemy</span></b></span>, i am always there to catch me of guard in order to sabotage myself..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>my friend is me so is my enemy....</b></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcU3ywQ0IMuHL75d8pjpZFnYjiWpW0b8zE8sRX9iAKKQUdJ-88YTTXQvX9Tl2KzVzTHozVXXsFmWo8FGKissjsjDJyoCx_6dpcflubUOcrCzqNGN22-GFK3rjUyP6E4J_N52ETzXj1tg7B/s1600/mara+nampak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="316" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcU3ywQ0IMuHL75d8pjpZFnYjiWpW0b8zE8sRX9iAKKQUdJ-88YTTXQvX9Tl2KzVzTHozVXXsFmWo8FGKissjsjDJyoCx_6dpcflubUOcrCzqNGN22-GFK3rjUyP6E4J_N52ETzXj1tg7B/s400/mara+nampak.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> internal conflict, think u can handle it???</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-26152728605004728752010-07-23T20:32:00.000+08:002010-08-05T08:55:00.760+08:00im lovin' it<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>there are many different types of love</b></span>..there is the love between you and your friends, the love between you and your family, the love between you and your partner (if you have one), the love between you and yourself, and the love between you and the universe. Though really, they are all the same thing (since you are the universe)..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">sometimes, when you love someone or something in a very special and profound way, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>that love is unconditional</b></span>. People throw that term around a lot — but I’d venture to say that few people mean it..parents often say that they love their children unconditionally..but the number of "<i>akak2 cik cur"</i>, for example, is staggering,which shows me one of a few things, either they have no other choice, or they are not able to do anything else or anything..but whatever the reason is, i believe<span style="font-size: large;"><b> <span style="font-size: x-large;">the main factor is that they have not been accepted by their own family</span></b></span>.. that sort of love is clearly conditional–the condition being sexual orientation..but my point isn’t to illustrate the lack of love in the world. </div><div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">anyway, you can make a decision to love someone or something unconditionally..when you make that decision, to love someone totally and completely, something very beautiful happens..<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you accept that person for all that they are (and aren’t)</b></span>..in other words, you don’t try to change that person..at times that person may make choices that you wouldn’t make, but you don’t judge them as right or wrong..<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you simply accept that moment</b></span>, and accept that other person exactly as they are..i see a lot of people who have “cafeteria” love for their partners..that is to say..there are some things that they really love about their partner, and some things that they really hate, or at least wish that they could change..the thing is, all those aspects make up that unique person..<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you can’t love just a part of your partner</b></span>, you must love him or her as a whole — that is, without conditions. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">naturally, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>unconditional love shouldn’t be saved for just boyfriends</b></span>, girlfriends, husbands, or wives..in fact, applying unconditional love to the entire universe is a very beautiful concept..when you love and accept all parts of the universe, you stop struggling against the moment..it takes an incredible amount of energy to struggle against the moment, and in the end, you are only struggling against yourself..when you love the world unconditionally, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you stop seeing the illusion of duality</b>. </span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;">so, i am making a decision right now..i will love the universe unconditionally–<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>because i love and accept myself, totally and completely</b></span>, and i recognize that the distance between me and the world “around” me is, of course, zero...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitj1AdZCYBOE-qCtGvcDuhlOpuQGN71BoDQpDTJL5sv41LhjH51QxxYF2wkOQRRyBpLbmRL3CeRxgkeOzEnOG5aFVBgD2WTNbLYkukAkjLxklwJQsAk7WCsKrHZVtob67KhYOm7sPVVYBP/s1600/DSC06621.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitj1AdZCYBOE-qCtGvcDuhlOpuQGN71BoDQpDTJL5sv41LhjH51QxxYF2wkOQRRyBpLbmRL3CeRxgkeOzEnOG5aFVBgD2WTNbLYkukAkjLxklwJQsAk7WCsKrHZVtob67KhYOm7sPVVYBP/s640/DSC06621.jpg" width="483" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">universal love... </div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-90883098140363447642010-07-21T12:39:00.000+08:002010-08-05T08:56:41.529+08:00welcome back<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>i have to say</b></span>, the pleasure of pouring my ideas here had been wonderful, and all those entry that i posted had always been what i thought about others,<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><b> <span style="font-size: x-large;">how i disdainfully humiliate them</span></b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>..</b></span>this time i have change, <i>or so i believe</i>, this blog will be about <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>my principles</b></span>, the funny things i encountered every other day, the books that i read, the people whom i meet (without judging them or bitching about them), this blog will be about me..<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>my personal diary</b></span>, a diary that i dedicate to my friends and those who have always believed in me..<span style="font-size: large;"><b> </b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>having all that being said</b></span>, and having you guys knowing me, i cannot say that i will not use this blog as a medium of channeling my rage towards the world and the people of the world..by now you must think of me as an <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>undecisive, unchangeable,</b></span> <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>self-proclaimed diva</b>..</span> but what i would dare to say is that you are in for surprises,i will try my best to surprise you..for those who have known me for quite some time, after reading my blog for some time i'm sure <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>you will think less of me</b>,</span> just like what i have always said, <span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>"i'm not a 100 dollar bill, not every one likes me, but i like me,"</b></span>..so i will end the beginning of my new blog with my favourite quotation said by Abraham Lincoln,<span style="font-size: large;"><b> <span style="font-size: x-large;">if i were two-faced, would i be wearing this one?</span></b></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>??</b></span>this quotation has made my fateful search in looking for my lost identity much easier..</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD25CAANvS7uaTmlcLpbBVqcGXHeMbIKFS75fk86qqmT3JlKgOmWmgxnRDxETL3srIIE4fICyHLtf4juM2H6cH6h75rfb5tmIkGZIlOWqRPkfmzUPsSvI6bZo-ZAptlFmUkNgmh9S1_C7T/s1600/DSC06700a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD25CAANvS7uaTmlcLpbBVqcGXHeMbIKFS75fk86qqmT3JlKgOmWmgxnRDxETL3srIIE4fICyHLtf4juM2H6cH6h75rfb5tmIkGZIlOWqRPkfmzUPsSvI6bZo-ZAptlFmUkNgmh9S1_C7T/s640/DSC06700a.jpg" width="430" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>this is a three-faced me..</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
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</div>le soulful vaudevillianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15017852756547661556noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2335674049128765058.post-14754929091164940042010-03-14T19:08:00.000+08:002012-10-11T07:39:37.311+08:00best conversation ever..<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Hye, can we talk? <b style="color: #660000;"><i>But we never do that</i></b> Yeah I know, but I wanna thank you for performing that song with me in Glee Club, 'cause it's made me do a lot of thinking, </span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">what I've realized is why I'm such a bitch all the time, I'm a bitch because I'm angry, I'm angry because I have all these feelings, feelings for you that I'm afraid of dealing with because I'm afraid of dealing with consequences...</span> and Brittany, I can't go to Indigo Girls Concert, I just can't<i> <b style="color: #660000;">I understand that</b> </i>Do you understand what I'm really trying to say? <b style="color: #660000;"><i>Not really</i></b> I want to be with you, but I'm afraid of the talks, the looks. You know what happened to Kurt at this school, <i style="color: #660000;"><b>But honey.. if anybody were to ever make fun of you, you would either kick their ass or slash them with your vicious, vicious words.</b></i> Yeah I know, but I'm so afraid what everyone will say behind my back. Still, I have to accept that I love you, I love you, I don't wanna be with Sam, Finn or any of those other guys, I just want you, please say you love me back,<i> <b style="color: #660000;">Of course I love you, I do, and I would totally be with you, if it weren't for Artie, I love him too, I don't wanna hurt him, that's not right, I can't break up with him,</b></i> <span style="font-size: x-large;">Yes you can, he's just a stupid boy,</span> <b style="color: #660000;"><i>But it wouldn't be right... Santana, you have to know, if Artie and I were to ever break up, and I'm lucky enough that you're still single,</i></b> <span style="font-size: x-large;">Don't</span> <i style="color: #660000;"><b>I am so yours. Proudly so.</b></i> <span style="font-size: x-large;">Yeah wow, whoever thought that being fluid meant you could be so stuck?</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLDh30J2c1zkaXuWSusIvfytZAUigF8XSeD0ouQOSmDhcEwAI3wyD3LB0ZZkxwSFzmu5fgEHqYwUc6uUbWSyTOFytDnZhfJm9toKf8DhvXGpUuDUPLeQyfnVu3fWAFs05VyOpRUZCqwbjV/s1600/santana+%2526+brittany.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLDh30J2c1zkaXuWSusIvfytZAUigF8XSeD0ouQOSmDhcEwAI3wyD3LB0ZZkxwSFzmu5fgEHqYwUc6uUbWSyTOFytDnZhfJm9toKf8DhvXGpUuDUPLeQyfnVu3fWAFs05VyOpRUZCqwbjV/s640/santana+%2526+brittany.jpg" width="512" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Santana is a bitch, so what??</span></div>
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